DAY 1: Pool Hopping (Northeast)
GRJOtagja
Back in the 1970's, this lava cave was the place to bathe due to the thermal vents supplying warm water from the ground. After several nearby volcanic eruptions in the 80's, the water surpassed safe-bathing temperature and closed to the public. Although the water has cooled down since then, the cave is still off limits for structural reasons, but that didn't stop Jon Snow and Ygritte from consummating their relationship inside this cave in Game of Thrones (Season 3 Episode 5). In the interest of safe sex, you would be much better off consummating your relationship elsewhere. If you can't help yourself, consummate at your own risk.
Suggested duration: 15-30 minutes. Visit www.northiceland.is for more information.
hverir
To see what the Viti crater looked like in its formative years, albeit on a smaller scale, head to this hellish wasteland where you'll be subtly reminded of the destructive forces lurking beneath the surface of our planet, in the form of fumaroles, mud pools and the general smell of destruction. It goes without saying but stay on the path; getting boiled alive will certainly ruin your vacation.
Suggested duration: 30-60 minutes. Visit www.northiceland.is for more information.
viti
Hell has risen in the form of this crater, literally "hell" in Icelandic, formed not by the footprint of a gigantic mythical horse but by a massive volcanic eruption in 1724. Mud boiled in this crater for almost a century before settling down, turning to a cool, photogenic shade of blue. Great views can be had from any angle, even from the parking lot for those less inclined to move. Alternatively, you can easily hike for one hour around the rim, or make things more strenuous with an hour round-trip hike to the water and back up. If you're feeling adventurous, you can also swim in the crater, but get out before mother nature decides to throw another tantrum.
Suggested duration: 1-2 hours. Visit www.northiceland.is for more information.
dettifoss
This waterfall is the most powerful in all of Europe, a product calculated through water flow and fall distance, or just by looking at it - it's so powerful that if you stand on the cliffs that flank the drop-off point, you'll still get sprayed from the impact, over 144 feet below. You may notice the falls from the opening scene of the movie Prometheus, when a humanoid-alien thing that's standing at the edge of the falls drinks some weird potion and his DNA dissolves in the water. The movie gets even more confusing from here, but if there's one lesson to learn it's that you shouldn't enter the water or stand too close to the edge, let alone drink alien potions.
Suggested duration: 30-60 minutes. Visit www.northiceland.is for more information.
asbyrgi (Spring-fall)
When Norse-god Odin's giant eight-legged horse Sleipnir stepped foot on the earth here, this canyon was born, at least that's the working theory. There are several hiking paths to choose from, regardless of your fitness level - you don't have to have eight legs to have a good time here. The most popular hike is the Eyjan cliff. Just follow signs to Eyjan for a mildly strenuous three-mile hike. The most peaceful hike is the Botnsjorn Pond, four miles there and back, where you can take in the peaceful surroundings from a pond-side platform. Just be aware of the canyon's folklore. While you're watching ducks, you're probably being watched by elves.
Suggested duration: 3-4 hours. Visit www.northiceland.is for more information.
Bonus: arctic henge (Spring-fall)
What looks like a monument built by the ancient pagans of Iceland is actually a tribute to them, with construction beginning in 1996. Like Stonehenge of England, the structure acts as a sundial that casts different shadows at different times of the day but perhaps the best time to be here is on an aurora-heavy night, an experience that connects you with the ancient people of 1996.
Suggested duration: 60 minutes. Visit www.northiceland.is for more information.
STAY THE NIGHT IN: myvatn
DAY 2: Baptism by Water (North)
Myvatn nature baths
This man-made lagoon is just as warm and milky-blue as the Blue Lagoon yet the common tourist doesn't venture this far north (perhaps they're afraid of polar bears) so you may have the whole lagoon mostly to yourself and a steep discount compared to its counterpart, which somehow makes it all the more relaxing. Tired: You. Wired: Myvatn Nature Baths. Expired: The Blue Lagoon.
Suggested duration: 2-3 hours. Visit www.northiceland.is for opening times and more information.
godafoss
The "fall of the Gods" is a fitting name, when you consider the events that transpired here. In the year 999, the Icelandic lawman Thorgeir Ljosvetningagodi threw his statue of Odin in the waterfall, marking the literal fall of the ancient gods, and the transition of Iceland from a pagan to a Christian country, a bold move considering the threat of retaliation by Odin's giant eight-leg horse.
Suggested duration: 30-60 minutes. Visit www.northiceland.is for more information.
whale watching
There are many tours in the world where you might see whales and dolphins but few can offer a 99% guarantee that you will actually see any. One of the few stretches of ocean in the world not yet filled with trash, the coast off Northern Iceland offers practically guaranteed sightings of various whales and dolphins, plus fresh-fish tasting and hot chocolate on the winter tours. Don't pass up this once in a lifetime experience to see these beautiful creatures before we smother the rest of them in oil spill.
Tour duration: 3 hours. Visit www.arcticseatours.is for tickets, tour schedule, and more information.
bonus: Safnasafnid
akureyri
Iceland's second largest city, after Reykjavik, is also known as the "capital of northern Iceland." It is said to have been settled by vikings as far back as the 9th century, though there is no official record of civilization here until 1562 which was a court sentence for adultery (not a good start, but they're going strong). Lest you think this is a place of sin (not that that would stop any of you from visiting), the main place to see is the church Akureyrarkirkja, the design of which rivals that of Hallgrimskirkja of Reykjavik. Lest you think this is a place of worship, there are opportunities for some gluttony, in the form of licorice ice cream, sold at local ice cream shops, and local craft beer at Einstok brewery. Also worth mention: Akureyri is home to the world's northernmost golf course as well as Domino's Pizza which may be the only valid reason to ever eat Domino's or to play golf. (Is golf even a sport?)
Suggested duration: 3-4 hours. Visit www.visitakureyri.is for more information.
STAY THE NIGHT IN: AKUREYRI
DAY 3: Forces of Evil (Northwest)
siglufjordur
This beautiful town in the middle of nowhere has everything you would want from a small town: art galleries, brunch spots, coffee shops, boutique stores, scenic walks along the pier and through quiet streets filled with colorful homes, a herring museum (just go with it!) All these things make Siglufjordur a popular holiday spot for native Icelanders and the Danish who arrive directly via boat in summer, when the town comes even more alive with folk dancers, singers, and fish preparation demonstrations (just go with it!)
Suggested duration: 2-3 hours. Visit www.northiceland.is for more information.
hofsos Pool
From the team that brought you The Blue Lagoon, this isn't your ordinary town pool. With the mountains looming tall behind you and the edge of the pool transitioning into the Arctic Sea before you, it might just be one of the prettiest pools in the whole world. Between the low entry cost, warm mineral water, modern facilities and frequent aurora sightings, you'll be here until closing time.
Suggested duration: 2-3 hours. Visit www.northiceland.is for opening times and more information.
alternative: grettirs pool
borgarvirki
This natural volcanic plug was fortified by viking settlers in ancient times to serve as a battle fortress that's somewhat reminiscent of the Weathertop fortress in Lord of the Rings. From the top you can explore the ruins, enjoy the views of the surrounding land or stand watch, in case of a Nazgul assault. In the event you do get stabbed by a Morgul blade, you will need Elvish medicine to heal.
Suggested duration: 30-60 minutes. Visit www.northiceland.is for more information.
hvitserkur & phare de Skaro
Like the variety of shapes people see in clouds, there are many possible shapes to see in this rock formation. Some people see a dragon, or some other creature taking a drink of water (cold water tastes great after a night of heavy fire-breathing). The locals say it used to be a troll who hated the sound of church bells (typical heathens), and plotted to sneak-attack the church by sea at night but either his timing was way off or he forgot to take into account the shortened nights during summer solstice because he was still en route when the sun rose, turning him (or her) to stone just off the coast. Now that you've heard the story, you may be able to see the shape of a troll, with it's undersized head (holding it's small, heathen brain), holding a massive hammer in his right hand; the distinctive white coloring comes from all the birds that nest and shit on it (possibly as a form of revenge, adding further insult to injury). If you ask a scientist what shape they see, they'll tell you they don't see anything but a peculiarly shaped volcanic plug (which is why scientists are boring and have no friends). During low-tide, you can walk all the way to the formation, but keep guard during the summer, as the beach is littered with some very territorial arctic tern; they don't take kindly to tourists. The other side of the peninsula is the site of another rocky formation, not interesting enough to inspire fables, but interesting enough to visit.
Suggested duration: 1-2 hours. Visit www.northiceland.is for more information.
Kolugljufur Canyon
From the platform, just a few steps from the parking lot, you can get a great view of the Kolufoss waterfall and then walk further alongside this canyon, named after Kula the giantess, in case you thought all giants were men. She was said to have settled here out of love for the taste of the many salmon here. (Are we sure she wasn't just an ordinary bear?) At least she didn't eat humans.
Suggested duration: 60-90 minutes. Visit www.northiceland.is for more information.